


if you need a light

by orphan_account



Series: piece by piece, rubble to rubble [1]
Category: The West Wing
Genre: Emotional Hurt/Comfort, F/M, First Campaign, Grief/Mourning, Pre-canon (sort of), can be seen as a CODA to in the shadow of two gunmen pt. 2
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-04-15
Updated: 2020-04-15
Packaged: 2021-03-01 18:28:08
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 898
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23671588
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: Josh returns to the campaign after his father's funeral. Donna goes to find him.
Relationships: Josh Lyman/Donna Moss, Pre-Relationship - Relationship, josh lyman/pain
Series: piece by piece, rubble to rubble [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1644367
Comments: 8
Kudos: 112





	if you need a light

“Josh.” 

Donna pulled open his hotel door and stopped in the doorway. CJ mentioned he’d gotten in from the airport, and Donna had immediately dropped the phone back into the receiver with a hasty promise to call back the Congressman on the line, and had hurried down the road to the motel they’d called home for the past two months. 

Josh was sitting on the bed, head in his hands, but he looked up as Donna walked in. His bags were on the floor next to his feet, and he hadn't even taken off his coat. His hair was standing on end, his clothes were rumpled, and it was clear he hadn’t gotten much sleep over the four days he’d been away. Red-rimmed bloodshot eyes looked at her from under half-closed heavy lids. 

“Hi.” He said, voice raw. 

“Hi.” She said. Down the hall, she heard someone yell her name. She glanced down the hall, looked back at Josh, slipped into the room and shut the door firmly behind her. She sat on the bed next to him, and studied his hands, bitten raw around the cuticles. 

“How are you?” She asked quietly. 

She knew, of course. They’d talked every night he was gone- about work for the first few minutes, and then inevitably about anything but. 

“Uh,” Josh flexed his hands, splaying them out over his knees, and tipped his head towards the ceiling. “Mom cried, before I left.” 

“Yeah?” Donna watched as he drew into himself, his shoulders hunching over. 

“I don’t know, she's been okay the past few days. But it was like, the flood gates opened. I barely made my flight.” Josh said. “She said, she, uh, didn’t want to go home to an- an empty house.” 

It was silent for a moment. Josh’s breathing was becoming staccato, and Donna didn’t know, really, what to say, so she didn’t say anything. Instead, she wrapped her arms around his shoulders and drew him close. 

“Oh, Josh,” She said softly.

That was enough. The dam broke, and Josh’s short breaths turned into full-out sobs, one hand clamped over his mouth, and he fell against Donna’s shoulder. 

Donna felt her breath catch in her throat. She had only known Josh for a few months. She had never seen him cry before. Not even four days ago, when she had pulled him out of the party to tell him.

She had seen him spitting angry, on the warpath, grinning like a maniac, messing with her just to get her to bite back, jubilant, tired, stressed-

but this, this was broken. 

In the back of her mind, Donna was reminded that not only had she just gotten on the payroll for the campaign- the only senior assistant with no prior experience, not even a degree- but Josh was her immediate boss, and he was dating Mandy. 

But Mandy had disappeared to Nevada three hours after Josh had departed for Connecticut with thin excuses about supervising the volunteer campaign out there, and something told Donna she hadn’t been there for Josh. 

So, she sighed, and she held tight to him, and she let him sob, and sob, and sob. 

* * *

The next morning was an early one. Donna had washed her face hard, scrubbing to get off any evidence of tear tracks or puffy eyes, pulled on a sweater, and stumbled down the breakfast still half-asleep. She slid into a booth next to Ginger, putting her head down on the table. 

Ginger made a sympathetic noise and patted her shoulder. 

“Long night?” She asked, flicking open the newspaper. 

“Something like that.” Donna mumbled, moving her head to the side to look at her. 

“Josh got back last night?” She asked. 

“Yeah.” 

“So awful, about his dad.” 

“Yeah.” Donn cleared her throat. 

Ginger became engrossed in the newspaper, and Donna closed her eyes, willing herself to catch an extra five minutes before her inevitably eighteen hour day truly began. Something was set on the table, and she suddenly smelled hazelnut. 

Donna cracked open her eyes and found Josh in front of her, bundled in his coat, snow still melting in his hair. There was a massive coffee in front of her from her favorite shop across town, along with a blueberry muffin. 

He still looked tired. The bags under his eyes were starting to look permanently etched into the soft lines of his face. But he was smiling, a little. 

Donna sat up and picked up the coffee. It was exactly how she liked it- too sugary, lots of hazelnut, and she definitely tasted espresso shots in there. 

“You got me coffee?” She asked, wrapping both her hands around it. 

“Well, yeah.” Josh rubbed the back of his neck. “Just- thank you.” 

He met her eyes, and there was still a heavy sadness behind them. 

“Josh, of course.” Donna said. “Always.” 

The side of his mouth quirked upwards, but Toby called him from across the room, and Josh gave her one more glance, before crossing the room to join him and CJ. Donna watched as CJ wrapped him up in a quick hug, seemed to interrogate him about his well being, and then, once she was satisfied, punched his arm for not getting her a coffee. 

Donna looked down at hers. _Donnatella_ was scrawled on the side, along with the exact specifications for her order. 

Donna hadn’t even known he knew it. 


End file.
